Before I was anything, I was something

Before I was anything, I was yours. Fearfully, wonderfully made, or something.

But I wonder sometimes if you meant me to be this

a half of something, a shadow of something,

a flickering image of light or wrath or...

something else entirely

and I wonder if I am missing that part of cruciformity

that looks like the cross

because I don't want to bear anything anymore

I just want to be back to that something

Was I radiant? Was I free? Was I loved? Was I enough?

Or am I just a fool,

hoping for mirrors to tell me I am more than I am,

more than a severed vine, rotting, worthless

more than a shameful creature, cowering in the corner of the Garden

more than someone else's Something

this is your body, broken for us

here's my body, broken for someone

but

here's my body, broken for nothing

sorry, I know you wanted me to be something

or was it Some Thing?

Someone's Some Thing?

i can't remember but

this is your blood, take

I have been bleeding for three weeks straight

and feel nothing but lightheaded

and sorry, but take anyway because

what else

can

but

taken

how deep how wide your love

how small and useless mine

how small

and

useless

mine.

Comments

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